Hypericum

I'm always encouraging people I know to consider the view, to take a little time to enjoy it. It's so much easier to give advice to others than it is to listen to your own heart sing. Why is that concept so difficult? It seems like it's time to fine-tune and redefine myself in the wake of change. I'm terrified of success but the idea of not achieving it is horrifying. Confidence is something that you don't acquire, it's something you work at. I suppose like other emotions, it has it's high and low. I just want to hang onto my ability to stay confident in all of the new territory I have started to embark upon. The OKIEMAMA zine is now available online to read. My first published article on Astrology is there. I feel good about that. I just had two of my pieces of jewelry included in a wonderful editorial by Sisters of the Black Moon, whose site I adore. I feel good about that. I threw an incredible graduation party for my husband last weekend who just completed his state exams for architecture and is now licensed. I feel good about that. I have an incredible garden that is flourishing and beautiful and healthy. I feel good about that. But for some reason, I still feel like I have to consciously work toward letting go of my past. Things that I cannot change. I have overwhelming moments of sadness and doubt and I think it keeps me from moving forward in the way that I really want to. Do I need therapy? Does that work have lasting effects on the future? Can you undo some of that emotional programming that you underwent and can you go onward with single-mindedness in pursuits? I think the answer is YES! Affirmations of the highest kind can work miracles on the subconscious and today, I am doing that. It's just kind of a moody day. Something is brewing in the atmosphere and it too, shall pass. One day at a time is kind of trite, but remembering to consider the 30 day cycle is what's important. Namaste.

Cherry Oh Baby

The day opened behind rose-tinted Givenchy. My mind must have hit the refresh button sometime through the night. I can read omens like cards. It's a thing I do. The veil is thinner for me with regard to the psyche, subconscious, projection and intuition. Not that mine is any better than anyone's - it isn't. Mine has the ability to penetrate solid matter. Mine has the ability to see and sense things just moments before others do. Mine has the likeability of a mirror. I am really good at helping others see things about themselves. This is not subject to opinion. When you can work like a go-between, it's something else. "Medium" is over-used. I hate catch words. Let's say "gateway" like you're moving through a psychic wormhole. Like that much better.  I don't do anything special at all. It's kind of the same thing as preparing a recipe you have made many times, when you need no guide or instructions. Turning off, tuning in, dropping out.

Anyway, before I digress too far, what I was getting at was that yesterday evening, I was feeling very sensitive and in-tune to anything red, pink, rosy, feminine, earthy, organic. Though these are themes I indulge often, like most things, they swell and regress at appropriate times, usually signaling an atmospheric change. Be it weather, personal emotion, state of the body union, moon or Venus transit. The variegated Thyme in my garden is really a survivor - it has been leafy all winter! Occasionally drifted over with a little frost, it appears to enjoy a gentle thaw. It has been turning more red and pink as the days have gotten shorter. That is photosynthesis at work there. The plant receives less sunlight and photosynthesizes less, meaning the less green pigment is made inside the cells. That's why trees turn red and orange in the fall. If you notice, it will always be the side of the plant or tree that faces directly into the setting sun that has the most color change. It's gorgeous. It's right on time with the arrival of my moon cycle first thing this morning. More symbolic than anything, and probably just to me. I wanted to start making and creating beautiful things today, as the moon's position is steadily and appropriately Pisces. Cue the imagination! Usher in creativity and drop the curtain on the waking dream state. Like a hazy, euphoric walking around kind of high. I associate the Pisces effect with dopamine. Really get into feel-good stuff, which usually requires some personal restraint and a tighter grip on control. It always seems like a good idea to take everything to the next level, with no ceiling under this influence. The lunar pull alone will do this, but when you add the menstrual muse it can ignite something quite unpredictable.

Diamond Girl

Ok, here's the thing: Writing is pretty cathartic and the truth is, I'm a slacker lately. My problem is too much passion and not enough manual braking. It seems like I push forward real hard and fast and have not been taking more time to stop and enjoy the view, to chronicle the experiences. Air signs have this manic nature to spread their interests really thin which usually leads to tons of projects going on simultaneously and not much to show for. It's all of this unfinished business, lots of it. And though most of it shows promise, it's kind of a bummer when one thing stalls out and I pick up something else because the inspirement (my seven year olds invented word) has fizzled. SO! A good resolution, goal, dream for this year is to be productive and see things through to the end.  Jewelry design is going well. Was approached by a friend who owns a little vintage shop and has a Saturday market starting in the spring, about contributing my designs to both. YES! I am pretty sure that maybe a nudge in the right direction like this will allow me to put other DIY's aside and just drive in third gear. Being single-minded in pursuits is a learned behavior for me, and I am committed to getting better at it. Though my palette is more of a vision board than an actual product manual, I have some good images that show for the beauty of it.

Probably these images speak for themselves but captions are also useful.
The Flaming Lips NYE concert
Uzi in the sun
Latest adventure in body ornament design: a convertible bra or double shoulder harness
Noel Begonia in continual bloom
RUN DMC Jonas
A drawing me and Sylvan worked on - inspired by Jean Michel Basquiat
Metal peacock - thrifted a pair of them
Obsession with lunar influence
Vintage quilt square - punk is American

XOXO

Personal Jesus

I take a John Lennon approach when it comes to standardized religion. I believe in the things that make my brain tick and whir. The stuff that seratonin is made of. Plants, geometric shapes, fabric, color wheels, Astrological goo, texture, children's imaginations, bones, music, SEX. Vintage prints have special godliness. This is the record bass capital of Missouri, not a graveyard for christians.

Menswear vintage fedora, Spicy Girl tattoo art dress, Chinese Laundry ankle wraps, Old Navy specs.

Baron Von Tolbooth and the Chrome Nun

When I feel real put out with everything, I start taking things apart. I made these earrings by dismantling a necklace. It's my methodology for coping with a pre-existing dissatisfaction. I live on a Bare Trees kind of budget. Creation and destruction are equally enjoyable to me. Coming down from one makes the other one feel good. Two themes that touch the creative process. One of them is very hopeful and one of them is the portrait of a disappointment. I'm not complaining. Today is pivotal on my success to start and finish something simple.

• vintage couch
• mixed metals
• repair dress, manicure
• do some coffee
• downtime
• Jefferson Starship

Opening Ceremony

There's something kind of inflated about beginning a blog with the letter 'I', so in order to avoid that, we are going right into music, which simultaneously activates both sides of the brain.