Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Hypericum

I'm always encouraging people I know to consider the view, to take a little time to enjoy it. It's so much easier to give advice to others than it is to listen to your own heart sing. Why is that concept so difficult? It seems like it's time to fine-tune and redefine myself in the wake of change. I'm terrified of success but the idea of not achieving it is horrifying. Confidence is something that you don't acquire, it's something you work at. I suppose like other emotions, it has it's high and low. I just want to hang onto my ability to stay confident in all of the new territory I have started to embark upon. The OKIEMAMA zine is now available online to read. My first published article on Astrology is there. I feel good about that. I just had two of my pieces of jewelry included in a wonderful editorial by Sisters of the Black Moon, whose site I adore. I feel good about that. I threw an incredible graduation party for my husband last weekend who just completed his state exams for architecture and is now licensed. I feel good about that. I have an incredible garden that is flourishing and beautiful and healthy. I feel good about that. But for some reason, I still feel like I have to consciously work toward letting go of my past. Things that I cannot change. I have overwhelming moments of sadness and doubt and I think it keeps me from moving forward in the way that I really want to. Do I need therapy? Does that work have lasting effects on the future? Can you undo some of that emotional programming that you underwent and can you go onward with single-mindedness in pursuits? I think the answer is YES! Affirmations of the highest kind can work miracles on the subconscious and today, I am doing that. It's just kind of a moody day. Something is brewing in the atmosphere and it too, shall pass. One day at a time is kind of trite, but remembering to consider the 30 day cycle is what's important. Namaste.